The Other Side

Looking back, I remember how excited I was to move into my very first apartment after accepting my teaching position right out of college.  Muggsie Lane became my new home.   It wasn't long before I was all settled in loving the independence of this new journey; one I had been dreaming of since a young girl.  Finally - my own classroom as Miss Sabers with my own students.  When I first started teaching, I loved it!  It was what I always wanted to do and truly a dream come true.  I had loved school as a student, and I wanted to pass on that same love of learning to young minds through creating engaging lessons.  After the newness, excitement, fresh ideas, and passion for this profession became replaced with dreaded discipline issues and even lesson planning that lost its appeal, my enthusiasm for my teaching career started to wane.  It was about this same time a few years into my new career that I began longing to find the right man to marry.  I felt the single life was only fun for so long; was the grass really greener on the other side of that fence - the one belonging to a young mother and father and kids playing in the backyard?

Along comes Ian, introduced to me through a mutual friend who was a student teacher from school at the time.  After a little over a year of dating, we became engaged.  After realizing we would be starting our own family some day, I knew I did not have the energy and ambition to attempt to raise a family and maintain the dedication to the teaching profession as well, so I took online classes for medical transcription in the midst of planning our wedding.  After I completed the coursework and started a new transcription job, typing nights and weekends while teaching during the day, I knew I wanted to transition from teaching to transcription.  That spring, I decided not to renew my teaching contract.  Was the grass really going to be greener on the other side - working from home?

Now that I am approaching the 5-year anniversary of my work-from-home job, I love it even more than when I first started.  I love the many benefits of being able to work independently from home and the flexibility to set my own hours while sitting at my computer in my sweatpants.  I was able to keep Eli at home with me during his first year of life while I also worked.  He started going to daycare twice a week when he turned a year old so that he could have some socialization with other kids without me there.  When he stopped taking his afternoon nap around the time he turned 3-1/2, I found it more of a challenge to keep him entertained while still getting my work done, so he started going to daycare more.  There are days sometimes when I wonder if I might re-enter the classroom and actually wear professional clothes again.  On second thought, I think at least for now I am quite content on this side of the fence in our own home in my comfy clothes by myself along with the rhythmic sounds of a doctor's dictation and accompanying chatter of the keystrokes. 

As for parenting, I remember imaging what kind of mother I would be even long before we conceived.  I also distinctly remember being sometimes even critical of other parents' child-rearing practices and thinking how I will be the strict, authoritative type who won't be "picking my battles" as a parent; I'm the one in charge, right?  I will win every battle!  Fast forward 3 years, and I realize as a parent you really do sometimes have to pick your battles, especially with a toddler learning how to make his own choices.  Even developmental tasks, such as potty training will only be accomplished in accordance with the child's own timetable - when they are ready no matter how long you have been ready for the next task to be acquired.  I regret the judgments I made of other parenting styles before I became a mother myself, especially now as I feel my own kid can be a reflection of my parenting.  There is a reason why many say parenting really is the hardest job.  I remember daydreaming of the day I would be able to have a "real" conversation with Eli when he was just a newborn, wondering, will the grass really be greener on the other side of that fence when he gets older?  Each stage of a developing baby and toddler seems to quickly be replaced with new challenges along with new adventures and milestones.

I still look longingly at my first place of residence in Maquoketa whenever we drive by Muggsie Lane, reflecting on my new-found independence as a young adult in the real world for the first time living a carefree lifestyle only responsible for myself.  Some days when I am feeling a bit overwhelmed, I think back to living on the other side of the fence over there in the apartment complex, but then I am quickly reminded how much my life has changed since then and for the better; happily married, enjoying a stress-free flexible job, and most of all raising a happy little boy.  It seems like a lot of times in life we are looking forward to what the next stage or journey in life might bring instead of simply being content at the point where we are now, wondering if the grass really is greener on the other side of that fence.  In this season of my life, I think the grass is really much greener on this side of the fence and I wouldn't have it any other way. 

"The grass is always greener where you water it."

-Neil Barringham